About A Girl

...I know that I've been away for "awhile", but come on folks...why did no one mention THIS: (clicky on the pic)



How YOU doin'? Excuse me a moment while I relive The Stripper routine from the Pop Odyssey tour...

Ahem. You all can go back to your business now. Really, I mean it. Shoo!

(article courtesy of CNN.com)

NEW YORK (AP) -- Lance Bass doesn't want others to stay silent as he did.

So he's made a public service announcement for the Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network (GLSEN). The spot, which is being distributed virally Friday, debuts in advance of the 11th annual National Day of Silence on April 25, when students take a vow of silence to protest bullying, harassment and discrimination in schools.

"I think it's time for me to stand up ... and help educate, because I'm lucky enough to have been given a voice to be able to talk and grab the attention of people," said the 28-year-old singer, who's gay.

"Everyday, thousands of students are silenced. They're silenced by fear, they're silenced for being who they are. ... They're brothers, they're sisters, they're gay, they're straight, they're you, they're me."

Bass, who recently completed a stint in the Broadway musical "Hairspray" and released a memoir, said the PSA is meant to honor Lawrence King -- a 15-year-old student was shot and killed in February in Oxnard, California, by a younger boy because he arrived at school in feminine attire.

"I heard about Lawrence on the news, and it was just incredible to me that kids that age that would have such an issue ... with the subject of being gay," said Bass, who was part of the boy band 'N Sync. "It also shows me that these kids don't -- they don't learn (bigotry) on their own. ... They're being told by older siblings or family members or other fellow students."

Bass -- who joined 'N Sync in 1995 with Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez, Joey Fatone and Chris Kirkpatrick -- announced in July 2006 that he's gay. It took him a while to come out. ('N Sync went on hiatus in 2002 and has virtually disbanded now that Justin Timberlake's career has taken off.)

"I was very scared of ruining my four best friends' careers," he said. "The ignorance in me thought that if I did reveal that, that our whole life would crash and the group would end because everyone would hate us. But now I see how stupid that was, and I wish I could go back and be able to tell the world who I really was.

"And I think it would have been fine. My fans have always still stood by me, and they haven't changed. And I think it would have been great to be able to come out (at) the height of like the 'N Sync heyday -- I think it could have helped a lot of people."

On a lighter note: Will there ever be an 'N Sync reunion?

"There's always a chance that 'N Sync will do another album," he said. "I am totally game, I would love to. I mean, the best times of my life were with those guys."

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Laaaaaaaaance! I <3 him, THIS MUCH, for doing that PSA. I also heart him THIS MUCH for keeping the glimmer of hope that the guys will get together to do another album. Heck, if BSB and NKOTB can do another one...why can't *NSYNC? Just because of Justin's 'king of the mountain' game that he's been playing, doesn't mean that they can't give it one more try. Right? RIGHT?!

I am a huge fan of PostSecret  and was caught by surprise today by this one:



Because I know we've all wondered the same thing and it made me smile to know that one of 'us' sent that postcard in. Thank you, whoever you are, for voicing the question of so many.

Oh my god, you guys.

The Love Guru

It stars Mike Myers, Jessica Alba, and a one mister Justin Timberlake.

Please watch the preview, if only to see Justin because I swear that you will pee yourself...just a little bit.

Just go...watch it. For the sake of all that is good, holy, and pure.

Sickness:

Everyone in my office is dropping like flies from various versions of the flu. That is exactly why I've been huddled up in my little corner office placing a hex on every person who enters the door. Well...you know what I mean.

Lost:

I totally knew that Desmond was going to be Daniel's 'constant'! OMG! I friggin' love that show and it is my obsession. There, I said it. 

New bed:

Matt and I are picking up (tomorrow) a gently used California King-size Tempurpedic mattress w/box spring. I bought the frame for it yesterday, so we're all ready to go on that front. We just need to do some shuffling as far as his old bed and my old bed go. That will hopefully be accomplished tonight. I'm so excited...let me repeat that, SO EXCITED for not only A) a BIGGER bed, but B) a much more comfortable one. Matt's bed is only a Double, so you can just imagine how close our quarters are. We're not really cuddly sleepers and would prefer to be spread out like an eagle instead of sleeping next to eachother like mummies. Plus, his mom bought his mattress OFF OF A RACK at Sam's Club. He didn't even get to try it out until they brought it home. HELLO?!?! It's super firm and I hate it. I'm surprised that he doesn't have more back problems than the occasional aches and pains...because you know how they say that your spine is supposed to be perfectly in line when you sleep? Yeah, no. Not with that P.O.S.

Weather:

It's been totally nuts here lately. We've had 30+ days of snow this winter and of course the snow itself has been around longer than that...so probably a good 90+ days of actual snow on the ground. Today it's supposed to get up to around 50 or 55 (it's sitting at 46 right now), so that means that I'll be able to walk outside on my break this afternoon. I may even take Buddy for a walk when I get home! Ya'll, 55* right now is like a heat wave. I'm not even kidding. And it's SUNNY outside...so beautiful!

Wedding:

So it's next March 7th and we're obviously still planning some things out. Like this weekend, Matt and I need to find a place to do the rehearsal dinner...don't know why his mom wants us to find one THIS EARLY, but I digress. Mom and I plan on going to Kansas City to look at dresses within the next few months. I'm still doing Weight Watchers and have been a TOTAL SLACKER lately, so I'll be upping up the anty because it's kind of T-minus zero hour now and I need to kick my butt into gear if I want to get to my goal by this time next year!!!!

 I think that, in all reality, I should officially change my name to 'Snow White'. Honestly.

Here's what happened a little earlier today at work:

I was walking down the main hall to the restroom and I saw this puppy outside pawing at the front door to the building. I heard a man at the other end of the hall talking with a guy, saying that the puppy had followed him from the bus stop over on Adams. Well, I went outside and the puppy came running straight over to me. It is WAY too cold outside for anything to be running around unprotected, so I scooped her up and brought her inside to the HR window. She was a 3 or 4 month old beautiful chocolate lab with a white chest, huge paws, and adorable brown eyes. I talked to the HR ladies about what we could do (call Humane Society, etc.) and one of the gals said that she could take her home and put her in an extra kennel in her basement, then call the paper to place a “Found” ad. I said that at least she would have a warm place to stay instead of running around in the cold. I couldn’t just walk away and leave her out there, so I had to do something. I’m glad that someone can take her home for the time being. 

Baby puppy! I can't just leave baby puppies out in the bone chilling cold. Anyone who does has a heart made of stone.  :o(

I really need to stop neglecting my poor little journal. I had to dig through all the cobwebs just now so it could see the light of day!

So Matt and I have set a date: March 7th, 2009. We're having both the ceremony and reception at the Kansas History Museum. The theme is 'cherry blossoms'. 

More details to follow when we get some other things finalized.

I've been keeping a steady eye out for a nice house to rent here in town. Preferably one with 2-3 bedrooms, a basement, and a fenced backyard. And of course one that will accept 2 cats and a dog. It's been hard to find, I tell ya! 

Matt is trying to decide what path he'd like to take as far as the future goes. He LOVES the thought of being an Animal Control Officer, but has yet to get even an interview yet with the city. He's been calling them since AUGUST. The last time he called they said, "Well...it's in the hands of the Police department now and they take awhile..." Before he leapt into the realm of dogs, he was heavy into construction and was even enrolled in a (very crappy) community college program. There is a Technical Institute just down the street from us that has an HVAC program, which he was originally going to pursue before he met me. He's going to call around to a few places, maybe even some of the big Heating/Cooling companies here in town just to see what direction he needs to go in, chat with them about apprenticeships, etc.

I'm still at Jostens. Last week was awesome because my supervisor was gone from Tuesday - Friday. She was sick the latter half of the week, for which I felt bad for being happy...and it's not that I don't like her, because she's really the best Super that I've ever had...but you all know what it feels like to have the boss out of your hair for a few days. Come the end of this May, I will have been there a year! And in August, I will have 'officially' been there a year! 

We just started watching Saving Private Ryan. What an intense movie. I can't even imagine having to go through something like that. Pure hell.  

What the !?!?!?!%$#@$#@

Heath Ledger died.

He is dead.

As in like, not living any longer.

Oh my GOD, you guys. 

For the 7th year in a row, my 4 month long addiction began last night.  

My dear dear, American Idol.

I was worried last season, because it seemed to have lost it's way...but oh has it come back full circle, baby. They stepped off on the right foot this time around.

We had everything from Alexis (whom the judges compared looks-wise to William Defoe), to a horse-riding/cage-fighting girl that lived in a log cabin who could sang, to Temptress who received a group hug from Paula and Randy and even a pat on the shoulder from Simon. 

Oh AI, you have stolen my soul once again. Keep up the good work and I look forward to what Texas has to bring on tonights episode. 

All of this being said, I really need an AI icon.

Hello, hello! I've been lurking every day since my last post...I just haven't chimed in.  [hides] Forgive me!

I reached my Christmas weight loss goal of 20 pounds(!!!) before the office shut down for vacation. (We have a Weight Watcher's program here at work) That was a pleasant surprise. I also obtained a goal this week of -2.5 lbs, which is what our WW leader set for us to lose. She said, "If you want to lose 10 lbs. a month, that averages out to 2.5 lbs a week." So I did it! 

I'm at 229.2 right now. I haven't seen the 220's in FOREVER. FOR.EV.ER. My peak (which will never ever be reached again, thank you very much) was 265+. I stopped looking when it got that high so it actually might have been 270. 

My epiphany this week came as I was walking down the hall here at work yesterday. I noticed that it was quiet. Silent, if you will. See, when I was at my highest weight, my shoes started making these funny noises when I walked. Kind of like a screechcracksqueak. What was happening was that the arches of my shoes were actually collapsing because of all the extra weight I was carrying around. Isn't that crazy?! My poor shoes! I was putting them through pure torture. Not only am *I* glad to have that weight off, but I know they are too.  :oP

Matt and I are going to check out some wedding locations this weekend. We still haven't set a date...BUT, within the next few weeks we WILL have one. 

Omg...that means I really have to start planning. Oye!

You know, being afflicted by something is one thing and being able to take care of said affliction is another. I've been suffering from panic attacks since fall of 2002. I've been on and off medication since then...typically going 1 year on, 6 months off...etc. Well, I weaned myself off of it AGAIN a few months ago and thought that I could be strong! That I could do it myself and be cured forever! 

...
...

Apparently my brain didn't like that idea because just a few weeks after I stopped taking it...BAM. I had a panic attack when Matt and I went to St. Louis. Like a full-fledged, crying, snot-nosed episode. BAM. Just like that. 

It's been getting gradually worse since. Now it's like an all day thing, not so much with the crying, but more like I can't concentrate at work. I thought well, enough is enough. It's affecting my WORK now. $#@^!@. Seriously. Needless to say, I broke down my 'strong woman' facade and told Matt this morning, tears and all, that I think I needed help again and should call the doctor.

The medication is now, once again, in my hot little hands. Now I just have to tell my parents...not that they'll be mad at me, they'll be concerned...especially once I tell them that it was affecting my work and my ability to focus.

UGH. This is just nuts. If you have ever suffered from an anxiety disorder or still do, you are not alone. Sometimes I think it's the stupidest thing EVER to be afflicted by this, but it is honestly my kryptonite. It keeps me from being the strong woman that I want to be, that I DREAM of being. It cripples me. It eats my mind away like some plague. But when I'm on the meds, I'm better. I'm okay. 

And I'm listening to Christmas music, so the world is okay right now.

 You guys, I so LIED the other day when I said I'd never seen the Backstreet Boys in concert!!! OMG, I can't believe I lied like a mofo.

I saw them in 2000(?) on their Larger Than Life(?) tour. I put the question marks, because I totally have forgotten when and what it was called. Aaaanyway, then I remembered that the first poster that I EVER had in my room was of BSB.

And then *NSYNC came and stole my brain.

But you know? At least through all their rehabs, marriages, babies, psychotic mothers...they've stayed together!

It must be so difficult to be Justin [rolls eyes], I'm tellin' you what. He's gorgeous and I will always buy his CD's and crap, but...come ON, dude. Is it really better being alone? I bet it feels funny sometimes...like he's missing an arm or leg or something like that. He probably experiences 'phantom limb' syndrome. I bet you anything.

I'm just sayin'.

Baby, I would tell you every time you leave, I'm inconsolable...

You know, even though *NSYNC is no more [here's one for my homies -- *pours drink on ground*], at least SOMEONE stayed together.

Even though it IS Backstreet. 

But I'm glad that they did. Of course, they're minus Kevin, but...it's okay. He was cool, but he wasn't one of the lead singers. It's like if *NSYNC would've gone on without Justin or JC. I mean, come on. You know it wouldn't be the same. But the Backstreet Boys have really pulled their shiznit together on this new album.

I like it. Honestly. It's very very Backstreet, so you have to like them or have some inkling to like them, in order to really appreciate it. I can say right now that I'll definitely buy it because I need something else to make me happy and get me singing really loud in the car again, until Justin comes out with another CD or something. 

I got a smile listening to it over the weekend (here's a hint: http://www.theleak.vh1.com ) and in fact, it's playing loudly through my headphones here at work. I forgot how much I love AJ's voice! And Brian and little Nick and Howiiie!

...

You guys have GOT to stop me. I'm actin' something silly.

When they go on tour, I can bet you right now that they'll come to our new Sprint Center (which is the BOMB -- http://www.sprintcenter.com ) and this will be my first time EVER (yes, EVER) to see them in concert. I'm going, biatches. Just you wait and see. I want my Man!Band fix.

Oh yes and Matt's boss gave him GARTH BROOKS tickets on Friday!!! AAAAAAHHHHH!!!! Omg. I'm so excited.

 MTV's "The Leak" has posted Britney's 'Blackout'. I'm listening to it right now, here at work, and I have to say that...I can't even get through an entire song. 

...

I'm bored. This album is making me more bored than I was before! WHAT?! How can that be? It's BRITNEY. She's supposed to make me want to get up and dance around. But now she just has me feeling sad for her and wondering what the hell and who the hell talked her into doing this crap. I really am pulling for her, but I can't say that this is a great work of art, because in my opinion it's really not. It's too over-synthesized and there's more talking than singing. 

Ugh.

It's just not awesome.

 Dear food pushers (ie. my fiance's family),

Please STOP asking if I 'want more' and 'why don't you have another one?'. Just STOP. If I am hungry, I will EAT, but if I don't want another serving I WILL NOT TAKE IT. So PLEASE STOP ASKING!!!!111!!!

...
...

Seriously.

I have lost nearly 15 lbs and the reason I'm not eating more of your salad is because it's SWIMMING IN OIL and that is GROSS. If I wanted wet lettuce, I'd drown it in my water glass and DRINK IT.

omg.

Sincerely yours,
Emily

P.S. I still love you, despite your flaws.

VMA's 2007 recap:

Well yeah, it was Britney alright. I have to second starsprinkles comment about feeling a little sad for her, because honestly...I can't really comment on her performance. She did look off kilter and whether it be nerves or something else, for whatever reason she just didn't have it all together last night. My mom and I have discussed the fact that Britney is possibly bi-polar or may even have post-partum depression. Yes, she comes off as a 'trainwreck', but there is something far more deeper and personal going on behind the scenes. We only hear about the subpeona's from Kevin and how 'omg, she backed into a car again' or 'lashed out at another paparazzi'. You must be blind to think that she's just 'gone crazy'. I know depression, I've seen it before firsthand and experienced it myself. You walk around like you're in a haze and you DO feel off. You feel out of touch and lonely. Depression is a dark, nasty monster and with the way Britney has been acting, I absolutely would not be surprised if she isn't suffering from it.

On a lighter note...

Justin made me squee, which I'm still mad at him for. Matt referred to him as my 'boyfriend', thanks alot. I would've given a kidney, my liver, and my first 3 kids to have been in that Southern Hospitality suite. Ohmigod. Everyone seemed a little sad/mad when they'd have to go downstairs, away from the GOOD parties, to the main stage to do whatever. The intimate settings upstairs seemed hellavu lot more entertaining than that shiznit below them. 

I was expecting a bit more from the 'big, spectacular' performance at the very end. They (Nelly Furtado, Timbaland, & Justin) performed their collab song for like less than a minute! 

Also, I liked the set up this year, but yet I didn't. It seems like the stage keeps getting smaller every time they do one of these. Also, they sure kept the fans as far away from the main stage as possible. Everyone down front was a celebrity! All the 'regular people' were smushed in the back and in the balconies. That's why the parties upstairs in the suites were all the rave! You could not only partake in AMAZING performances, you could reach out and TOUCH your favorite singer! 

Well, that's my 2 cents. (Or is it fitty cents?)

 

So I have a new blog (no, I'm not leaving LJ). It's focused solely on my weight loss, so if you'd like to track it with me...clicky here:

Kan Doo Attitood

http://kandooattitood.blogspot.com/ 

Thanks in advance and I hope to see you there!

Justin, as we all know, is a DAMN good performer. He totally proved it on the HBO special last night.

And at the end? When he came out and teared up a little bit because of all the love the audience was giving?

My heart might have broken a little bit.

Just a little bit.

Okay, a LOT a bit.

Also, I love the fact that he's all grown and can show his *very* dirty side now. What a pleasure to see. ;o)

Oh Justin. Why do you make me like you so much?!!

And why don't I have a hot Justin icon????

I had a nightmare last night wherein absolutely NOTHING was planned for my wedding!!! NOTHING! There was no one to marry us (my mom had to ask all the guests if any of them could officiate it), no flowers, no music, no NOTHING.

Ohmigod.

I woke up and my heart was pounding. It was so real. And I was so SCARED! 

Thank GOD it was just a dream. 

In other news...

IheartChrisKirkpatrick.

That is all.